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Chapter 105 — Cemetery
Three days later, Mason was driving toward Ventura's cemetery, and had been bad feeling. Mary just once reminded him about the trip, but Mason was no longer equivocating. He decided that it was better to go there and forget about everything, although he dimly understood that never have forgotten about Chris.
Five of them went along the familiar path of cemetery. Mason led the older children, and Mary had on hands her one-month baby in the baby's carriage. Mason remember how less than a year earlier he got almost scared to death when he lost in thought and did not notice that Mary stepped aside, and then decided that she was alive just in his imagination. Now he no longer felt any mysticism; it was just an old churchyard.
They reached the grave, and Mason stood before it like at his last visit. And as then as he read the inscription.
"Beloved husband, father and brother Kenneth Duvall. Have a peaceful rest"
Mason released the children who curiously begin to walk around immediately. He pulled out the blanket of the bag and spread it down on the grass. Mary put down baby's carriage and sat beside it. Chipper immediately ran to her and hugged her neck. Mary takes her son on her knees. Mason catches Samantha behind the gravestone and having her on hands he sat down too.
"Not too scary, right?" Mary faintly smiled. Mason shrugged. He did not want to be here.
"What's the matter?" he asked noting that Mary listens for something.
"Mom and Christy arrived."
Mason turned and saw Theda and younger sister Mary who're coming in their direction.
"Grandma! Grandma!" Chip and Sammy cried out in unison and rushed to the women. Mary pulled awaken Mickey out of the baby carriage and also went after the children.
Now Mason was near the grave alone. He rose up from the blanket and stand before the gravestone with his hands in his pockets.
"Kenneth Duvall--" he muttered. "Or Chris Rock? How difficult to combine both of yours... Too pity that we cannot able to say goodbye, Chris--"
But Mason doesn't have a chance to finish his thought. A horrible realization runs though him like a stream of icy water. If they are never met, Kenneth Duval could stay alive! In his ears buzzing, in his mouth appeared bitter taste. He is guilty in the death of Mary father's! It's his fault!
Mason lowered his head and ran his hand across his forehead. Then he almost falls down on the grass. He forced himself to breathe deeply and regularly, and the shock began to pass away. But the terrible feeling of guilt not gone anywhere. Ruthlessly rang in my ears words of Lawrence Duval.
"... As his condition became worse. And in one of his "bad" days he said be that he meets with the boy in caves near beaches... I wanted to be with him to the end. But he forced me to promise that I will go to this dammed cave and tell his Golden Boy that he cannot come to their meeting... And when I did return to the hospital my twin brother already was without consciousness and did not come around until his death. And I began to hate "Golden boy" who not allowed me even to say goodbye to my twin".
If they never did not met! If they never become friends with Mary's father he would not suppose to spend precious time and energy to meeting with him, secretly going out the house, to quarrel with his twin brother... and eventually lost his life. "He already finished the fourth course, his condition even becomes a little improved--" Mary's uncle said. If he and Chris never had their meetings, he would have stayed alive. In the place of is sorry stupid Mason who does not realize that it's the matter of dead and life--
At some moment, Mason wanted to die for at least partially compensate what he done. But it passed... and was replaced by the feelings of guilt and shame. He stole a look at Mary. At Theda, selflessly squeezed Chip and Christie tickling Samantha... Do not they realize what he is the person whom need to blame? Or they are realizing, but forgive him? After all, then he was a boy and knew nothing.
This last idea was a little help. Mary turned toward him and waved, encouraging approach. Looking at her calm and smiling face, Mason seemed impossible that she could forgive him. The death of his father's broken up her life. And not only her life, but also her mother's and sister's. So he should keep his shameful secret. And probably he would succeed for while. But sooner or later, Mary put two and two together and realizes that she married with young murderer of her father--
Mason shrugged and then saw that Mary worried looking at him. He reluctantly got up and walked over to her. Said hello. Mary took his hand, tried to look into the face, but Mason turned away. Now he could not even look into her eyes. Watch and lie. Yes, Mason, you're returned to old Mason. Though you promised that there would be no secrets, but you are not going to open this... Devil inside him immediately tossed in the thought that Mary herself violated the same promise, by hidden from him news about recovering health of Eden. But that was little consolation. Eden, thank God, become better, not worse. And Mary did not kill anyone--
The rest of the day Mason lived like in a hell. He tried hard to look usually, but the shock was too strong to he was able to completely hide his feelings. Mary, thinking that he is experiencing due to the death of his childhood friend, tried to cheer him, and her care made Mason's feeling even worse. And even Theda... Mason regularly has caught her strange sight. She never did look at him like now. Did she understand? But the mother-in-law said nothing and behaved as usual. So it was only a matter of time.
Mason and Mary with children returned home, and Christy stayed with Theda, who said that want to spend a little more time with darling Kenneth.
While Mary tucking in the children, Mason quickly went to bed and when she returned, he is pretending to be sleeping soundly. He just unable to discuss the things that burned his soul with guilt. Even with Mary. Especially with her. He could not bear to her accusations and condemnation. He waited until Mary did fall asleep, then he slipped out of bed and went downstairs, poured myself a good shot of brandy.
Mary woke up because she felt that beside was empty place. She sat up in bed, remembering her dream. Or not dream? She tried to re-play it in her memory. No, it was not her dream. This was happened in reality! She got out of bed and went to look for Mason, shocked by his discovery.
Its easy was to find him. He was sitting in the empty living room and drinking. Mary stunned when she saw him completely lost figure. May he was too hurt after their visit to the cemetery? She remembered how his face become look alike a mask.
"Mason!" she called. "Mason."
He jerked by whole body and raised his head. Mary took a few steps toward him. Her gown and loose hair flashed in the moonlight pouring through the huge windows on the first floor.
"Are you here?" he muttered as his own voice sounded some strange for him.
"I must tell you something very important... I just realized it."
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